by Gary Sears and Spencer Kimball
We’re overdue for a timeout,
running close to the urge to kill
Junior’s on a caffeine overload,
grandpa’s taken one too many pills
We might be ok if my wife doesn’t get
too close to the lava lamp
Oh wait I spoke too soon down it goes over the
Chorus:
Christmas Eve Terror on Chestnut Drive
You other idiots think you’re under control
Maybe this is what they think is to thrive
Maybe insanity was only ever the goal
Forget the cookies and milk,
the fat man will be ready for sedatives
And the reindeer will be edgy
when they hear that screaming of the relatives
And who gets a bedtime
when everyone is the monster under the bed
But wait, oh no, it’s not weird Uncle Rasmussen!
Chorus
But hey, maybe we can take it
We aren’t like those wimps in the CA suburbs
If there’s a bet, we’ll stake it
On the horrors that start with only words
Why can’t you control those animals
I don’t see you helping matters
Can you please just calm down and sit
I think that dog keeps getting fatter
I told you she was going to puke
Why don’t you ever listen
If that idiot doesn’t get out of the bathroom soon
You’re gonna get wet cause I’ll be…
Chorus
@doglatin Feb 2022
Excellent, I love a good dark Xmas song. I've written a few of those myself! The music is perfect for the chaotic, spooky vibe, great lyrics that destroy many sacred holiday cows. What, no cookies and milk? The horror!