Feb 2022 folk singer songwriter acoustic-one-take cello baritone ukulele s020922 skirmish takeaway
Thanks @ajna1960 for hosting the skirmish, and for the "take away" prompt! This one took 10 takes to finally get one...so it really was life meeting the song.
Trying to do it
with a natural flow
without too much control
how long, no one will know
Getting tired of all these edits
and swiping out mistakes
Just waiting for that one time
damn, my throat aches
waiting for that moment
been at this all day
perfection is almost there
I’m just one take away
Hunger is overflowing
Kitchen empty as I look
I’ve been here trying
don’t want to cook
But I gotta take a break
to refresh my mind
so I call a local place
for delivery of some kind
It has been two years
when I ask they say
sorry sir, things have changed
we only do take away
So I bring it all home
but my family is back
noise is too bit much
to find that elusive track
I smile and give some hugs
sayin’ I went and got dinner
set the table put out the mugs
one more chance to hit a winner
waiting for that moment
been at this all day
perfection is almost here
I’m just one take away
@liz561 Mar 2022
Like the different views of "take away"-very clever. And love the uke-I'm a uker too! Great work on the prompt!
@nancycunning Feb 2022
Oh, I like this...one take away from perfection.....That's beautiful.
Reminds me of Gillian Welch's song about one more dollar.
And then the take away dinner for the family really put me in that moment of trying to of trying to finish up some music, while keeping one eye on the clock or smelling something burning and realizing I must have lost track of time again...
@prsongsmith Feb 2022
Outstanding! All the frustrations of the family-man’s FAWM experience in a single song! And extra points for working in two takes on the “take away” prompt!
@tunecat Feb 2022
O mg only just got the play on words . I heard ‘ I just wanna takeaway’ sorry clever word play shouldn’t go I commented on.
@tunecat Feb 2022
A FAWM song about fawning? Last year about half my output was in this subject. I can never get tired of songs is out songwriting. Well on reflection ‘the elusive track’ is the pre- FAWM head- FCC’s that FAWM is the antidote to - but really connect with this abs enjoyed muchly
@whispermouse Feb 2022
Baritone uke sounds like a lot of fun. "I’m just one take away" - I think you're the only one this skirmish to hit this meaning of "take." Nice skirmish!
@j8e2t56 Feb 2022
This is great! I agree: clever lyrics that are very relatable, a buoyant melody, super prompt interp. My add: I'm hearing such a sense of ease in your vocal delivery. Great vocals!
@jwhanberry Feb 2022
Yup, we've all been there. Good telling of the story. The take away food was a fun surprise; made me chuckle. Good skirmish work.
@berni1954 Feb 2022
Oh, is there a FAWMer who cannot identify with this one. Clever use of the prompt! Love the details.
@porrectus Feb 2022
That’s a cool picture of something we’ve all gone through. Nice work, well written well played.
@vegansongs Feb 2022
Aha! love that switchy double meaning- that was fun!
@cindyrella Feb 2022
How great is this? Wonderful and so many can relate Good skirmish!
@hmstreetteam Feb 2022
Oh, it’s so true! In recording songs and in many things in life there are many disappointing moments but it doesn’t pay to think in terms of distance. Nicely performed with an even energy and a good balance.
@chrishinch86 Feb 2022
“Sorry sir we have changed,
We only do takeaway”
Love that line. Enjoyed this!
@scruffyblues Feb 2022
Great interpretation of the prompt, this is a really cool listen.
@thedutchwidows Feb 2022
Really nicely done. Melodically very strong and great lyrics. Top work!
@musuko Feb 2022
This is very clever, and I love the melody. Especially when it grows and soars on the ending "take away" lines. I can certainly relate to this on many levels as well haha. Well done!
@kevinmason Feb 2022
What great storytelling! The multiple uses of take away are very clever. This is a perfect FAWM song, and one of the reasons I love skirmishes: you can't sit around waiting for that perfect take. Very good skirmish and interpretation of the prompt.