Lyrics written for Skirmish #S020222
Theme: too much baggage
Lyrics took about 50 mins, and yes, I do have way too much baggage lol
Verse 1
When I open my wardrobe door first thing
My baggage falls on my cold bare feet
All stuffed away, pushed out of sight
Pretending to be quite discreet
It's not
chorus
I've too much baggage
No one wants to know
What I'm doing now
I've too much baggage
Now I need to throw
So much from long ago
Now I need to throw
So much from long ago
verse 2
When someone new arrives on my dating scene
I try so hard to keep it dampened down
So I don't pour words out trying to redeem
Pretending to be quite a clown
I'm not
chorus
I've too much baggage
No one wants to know
What I'm doing now
I've too much baggage
Now I need to throw
So much from long ago
Now I need to throw
So much from long ago
Bridge
I should allow myself to implode
Then at least I'd be owed some hope
Instead I let the past corrode
And eat and spoil and provoke
chorus
I've too much baggage
No one wants to know
What I'm doing now
I've too much baggage
Now I need to throw
So much from long ago
Now I need to throw
So much from long ago
@liz561 Mar 2022
The collab really works well-good lyrics and the guitar really carries the song along rhythmically. The vocals were great with the harmonies on the chorus.
@berni1954 Mar 2022
Yes, that acoustic rock version works well for these lyrics. There's quite an Andy Roberts vibe about this.
@ohleeoh Feb 2022
Well done. It's so true that we can all, probably, relate to this. Thanks for this great tune. Looking forward to hearing more from you.
@cts Feb 2022
Admittedly there is a quite a bit of baggage with me, too! More literally than figuratively but all the same I can definitely relate. And please, let me know when the demo is ready! And upon a 2nd read; that bridge? I've wrestled with that thought inside my head many times!
@dragondreams Feb 2022
Well and truly up to your usual high standards of tuneful writing with an impeccable rhythmic sensibility.
Gimme the heads-up when Corey has worked his magic please!
@tjeff Feb 2022
Oh boy can I relate to this lyric. Super-strong chorus, and I like the how you structured the verses, especially the last 2 lines in each verse.
@berni1954 Feb 2022
I like the domestic images which as the song develops take on a far more philosophical role.
Good structure. I hope someone puts it to music for you.
@whispermouse Feb 2022
Nice opening image with the overstuffed wardrobe, quite an apt metaphor. I like the different tone the bridge sets, it casts that last chorus in a totally different light. Nice skirmish (and thanks for the prompt!)
@jwhanberry Feb 2022
Wonderful commentary on how the baggage impacts your life. Thanks for the fun prompt.
@auditasum Feb 2022
The first verse really sets the mood with the wardrobe bursting with baggage falling on cold feet. I relate.
@thedutchwidows Feb 2022
As others have said, the "I'm not" / "It's not" lines look rhythmically really interesting and I can totally see how they would punctuate the verses. Feels super honest emotionally, which always makes a good song in my books!
@tiller2 Feb 2022
The urge to declutter both materially and emotionally is well-expressed in this lyric. There's a lot to gain from doing so, though, as you warn, "Instead I let the past corrode/ and eat and spoil and provoke." Good skirmish, and thank you for hosting and coming up with an interesting prompt!
@sheilerk Feb 2022
I like the way the rhythm shifts with the words,"It's not", and "I'm not."
Nice smooth shift from the physical to the emotional baggage. Nicely done. :)
@mikeskliar Feb 2022
nicely done, and yes, going from the literal to the emotional is a great journey. And we both used the word 'discreet' in our songs to this topic, oddly enough!
@vivalarayna Feb 2022
I like how you start with the literal baggage then transition to the emotional. Solid bridge. The baggage does help with songwriting material, though! Hope you get a taker for collaboration.
@keithcuts Feb 2022
cool imagery in your lyrics here.
i see where you went with the prompt. very cool
all that baggage that weight is evident in the song lyrics
@hmstreetteam Feb 2022
Ouch! I mean the line with the bare feet of course. It’s a well-constructed plaint about a conflict that will be familiar to most of us. I like the structure of problem in verses and answer in choruses, and here you’ve used that classic frame to a T.