FAWMerick
-
@scubed Jan 2022
‘Though higher-brow FAWMers eschew it
And FAWMku-ists often pooh-pooh it
The time’s come to write
The trashy delight
Of FAWMericks - let’s all get to it! -
@tawny249 Jan 2022
So I tried to write something amusing
When I realized the rhymes of my choosing
Had already been used.
Though I wasn't amused,
At least this FAWMerick's less confusing. -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Aww, I already started a thread for this, but I didn't use the catchy portmanteau title. I kind of figured my thread would be overlooked... and I wasn't wrong lol. Anyway, here's how I kicked it off:
This thread's a perennial favorite
You might even say that I savor it
This annual rite
Fills me with such delight
If I had to, I'd probably pay for it -
@kenmattsson Jan 2022
There was a young FAWMer from Barrow
Who took his ideas from a sparrow
He brought out his quill
with too much of a thrill
and he impaled the bird like an arrow -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
FAWMerick's catchy, it's true,
It appeals to both me and to you,
But for sheer pared-down wit
And the discipline with it.
It's nothing compared to FAWMku... -
@postcardhelicopters Jan 2022
If you, at first, don't succeed
At FAWM'ricking just as you please
Be sure to dig in
And try it again
Since practice promotes FAWM'rick ease -
@kiffa Jan 2022
@timfatchen
If FAWMku are your thing, then that's fine
It may be your favorite, but not mine
With your time cut in half
I just tend not to laugh
When your set-up's also your punchline -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
Dear @kiffa, it may seem mysterious,
But the FAWMku at heart are all serious.
If laughs are your schtick
Then your plate's FAWMerick
For you'll find the FAWMku deleterious! -
@davi3blu3 Jan 2022
Hello to the FAWMing community,
Where we bond in our musical unity.
May your songcraft be honed,
In a judgement-free zone,
And creations abound with impunity! -
@tawny249 Jan 2022
Well, it's really not yet time for bed,
And I'd rather it never be said
That my FAWMericks were done
After writing just one,
That's why I've resurrected this thread. :D -
@kiffa Jan 2022
A FAWMerick or two before sleeping
Seems a habit that might be worth keeping
Then perhaps, as you're dozing
You'll keep on composing
Right until your alarm clock starts beeping -
@carleybaer Jan 2022
My brain is as fast as a turtle
Each rhyme is an imposing hurdle
But I’ll struggle and climb
Cuz it passes the time
Since I’ve already done today’s Wordle -
@artie Jan 2022
A sophomore to FAWM I return
Though it seems that I’m wrought with concern
While the passion ignites
My urologist writes:
"Your stream of delight shouldn't burn!" -
@scubed Jan 2022
Word games every morning for me!
(With a cup of black coffee or three)
‘Though the Wordle I’ve found
To the screen I’m still bound
I’ve not yet arrived at Queen Bee -
@scubed Jan 2022
FAWMku continues to jump
While FAWMerick sits like a lump
It always is thus
I won’t make a fuss
But I can’t resist giving a [bump] -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Do FAWMku-ers really abhor us?
Then let's lift up our voices in chorus
We'll force a reaction--
Think "Fatal Attraction"
Like Glenn Close, we won't let them ignore us -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
It's sad that you fear you're abhorred,
But we only do FAWM'rick when bored.
The rest of the time
We can do without rhyme
As we whet our wit with FAWMku's sword. -
@kiffa Jan 2022
FAWMericks, like FAWMku, are a choice
Do whichever one best fits your voice
While FAWMku may be prettier
I find FAWMericks wittier
But whichever you like, hey, that's noice -
@sheilerk Jan 2022
FAWMrick or FAWMku either one
Like WORDLE can be lots of fun.
It’s not writing a song,
But what could be wrong
With filling time till the opening gun? -
@kiffa Jan 2022
(I'm unleashing my long-repressed Boston accent for this one)
We're getting incredibly meta
While debating which poem form is betta
At least me and @timfatchen
Are both full of passion
About how to write FAWM a love letta -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
Miz Kaufman, down Mexico way,
Is confusing our fencing with play!
In fact, it's quite real
Finding rhymes you can deal,
And they'll be in a new song one day!~ -
@lowhum Jan 2022
FAWMku all you want bourgeois buggers
mating Japanese syllables one to another
here on the Black Sea
we don't listen to these
though lots came in bottles we recovered -
@bradbrubaker Jan 2022
"The FAWM's the thing," Hamlet said
Then presently stabbed the king dead
So write lots of songs
All Febru'ry long
Or Hamlet might kill you instead -
@davidbreslin101 Jan 2022
T'is tricky to play at the rhyming
And master the metrical timing
Which you needn't do
When writing FAWMku-
That's why their count's constantly climbing. -
@carleybaer Jan 2022
It’s true that FAWMkus are much shorter
Yet out of the chaos comes order
These FAWMericks slay me
But you couldn’t pay me
To play a song on the recorder -
@crisp1 Jan 2022
The choices of topics are sparse
We've fallen quite fast into farce
If all FAWMericks do
Is to skewer FAWMku
I'll move on to much darker arts! -
@davidbreslin101 Jan 2022
In a race that has only two horses
The struggle for place is remorseless.
FAWMtankas, FAWMsonnets
FAWMghazals, come on, let's
FAWM out heterogenous verses. -
@carleybaer Jan 2022
Though Portland is now where I stay
My heart is way back in Green Bay
I’ll dance a disco
When we beat San Francisco
And the great Green & Gold wins the day -
@scubed Jan 2022
The doc says he’ll operate
But on test results I must now wait
Will my surgeon’s sharp knife
Give my ankle new life?
Or will COVID cancel the date? -
@kiffa Jan 2022
The excitement is steadily mounting
As we're now down to 10 days and counting
Tell your family, your crew,
And your co-workers too
(Well, all except Ted from accounting) -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
As my instruments all need tuning,
I shouldn't be FAWMerick mooning.
While I know that that's dumb,
I'm a bit of a bum,
So I can't resist intercommuning. -
@crisp1 Jan 2022
It’s verging darn close to irrational
To sit here and act oh-so-casual
When we know in our core
Just what we’re here for
To stay cool is no less than laughable -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
Humidity here is now tropical
And how to stay cool is what's topical
But while others have seizures
I've been cleaning the freezers
And right now resemble a popsicle. -
@kiffa Jan 2022
I kind of abandoned this thread
Overlooked it, and left it for dead
The demand to be clever
Is a tiring endeavor
I've been making 'Fake Band' names instead -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
It's true, and I'm sad to admit
I only come here in a fit
Of misguided kindness
And FAWMku-caused blindness,
That FAWMerick might rise a bit. -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Be honest, dear Tim, you enjoy it
Or I'm guessing you wouldn't employ it
You've taken no oath,
It's OK to do both!
Your rep's good, and FAWMericks won't destroy it. -
@carleybaer Jan 2022
FAWMkus are a feathery cloud
While FAWM'ricks are boisterous and loud
There's nothing to lose
So there's no need to choose
Write whatever you please and be proud! -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
My zen-existential pride
Must be curbed and, indeed, mortified.
It's why I post here
'mongst the FAWMericks drear
Until my FAWMku pride has died! -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Well, your presence here isn't a rarity
But it isn't as if we need charity
As for me, I'd FAWMku
If it weren't sad but true
I can't tell a good one from a parody -
@aflinner Jan 2022
Where’s @stephenwordsmith, is he here?
Not in this thread yet (that’s clear)
The bee in his bonnet
Seems built to buzz sonnets
But surely, in time he’ll appear -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Each forum page has at its base
The words "FAWM is a friendly place"
I would hope you've assessed
That my barbs were in jest
But I'm ending them now, just in case -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
FAWMonnet, FAWMErick, FAWMku?
Not just for the odd and strange few:
For reason and rhyming
And metrical timing
A better skill set we accrue -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
There are Barbs a-many delight me
And the more I meet, fewer affright me.
See, I'm now at that age
Where there's room on the page
For as many Barbs as will bite me! -
@stephenwordsmith Jan 2022
It's a rare thing I warrant a mention
In a thread free of prior dissention
Now's my chance to burst through
With a bon mot or two...
May I kindly request an extension? -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
As it's said that the Truth makes you Free,
With your lingering I must agree.
For the Truth is, I fear,
That I have been here
Malingering longer than thee. -
@kiffa Jan 2022
February's so close, I can taste it
And I hope that this time, I don't waste it
I'm so eas'ly distracted
That FAWM's always impacted
And it's time that I finally faced it. -
@kiffa Jan 2022
@stephenwordsmith, we welcome you gladly
We could use more activity badly
Trading verse is a pleasure
So FAWM'rick at your leisure
Don't hole yourself up like Boo Radley -
@meldaltonmusic Jan 2022
This year I will give FAWM my best
Though focus is always a test
I'm really distracted
And my work is impacted
Wherever I notice a - Squirrel! -
@crisp1 Jan 2022
Who knows what tomorrow will bring?
A nice chance to dance or to sing?
But it’s January stuff
And that’s not good enough
It’s February that makes my bells ring! -
@crisp1 Jan 2022
The best use iambic pentameter
To make their verse so much less angular
’Cause language’s curves
Can make our brains swerve
I prefer words that slide down the bannister -
@berni1954 Jan 2022
A FAWMer from Barcelona
Fed up with the old Corona
Wrote songs every Feb.
He put on the web
That proved him a moaner and groaner -
@kiffa Jan 2022
I was born and bred just north of Boston
It's a city that you can get lost in
And the traffic's so dense
'Cause the roads make no sense
Even *writing* about it's exhaustin' -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
I claimed I was born in a trunk
Mama died and Daddy got drunk
But the crowd yelled "be blowed!"
"That's THEFT! Tobacco Road!
"To plagiarist levels you've sunk!" -
@davidbreslin101 Jan 2022
I confess that I do not yet feel
Represented by this glockenspiel,
And I've had the odd spat
With myself 'cos of that.
Still, the thing has a steely appeal. -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Up this way, a chilly nor'easter
Is coming to hand us our keister
If the snow piles as high
As newsmen prophesy
We could be digging out until Easter -
@carleybaer Jan 2022
I've always heard everyone say
The worst traffic on earth is L.A.
But of traffic I've sat in
Paris to Manhattan
It's Boston by far wins the day -
@bradbrubaker Jan 2022
New single release day for me
And it can be downloaded for free
I'm so very proud
So Bandcamp or Soundcloud
Or anywhere streaming will be -
@berni1954 Jan 2022
Oh @carleybaer I have to say
Boston? Indeed? No way!
From the airport to docks
Lagos often gridlocks
And it happens on every weekday -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Trent Reznor has had his travails
When on stage, sometimes his wardrobe fails
To avoid the extreme stress,
He tours with a seamstress--
A stitch in time saves Nine Inch Nails! -
@apolez3 Jan 2022
February starts to creep up; FAWMers gather their luck.
Collaborating or going it alone- Only fourteen more to bring it home!
Concentrating on the flow;
Inspiration is further to grow:
FAWM; the place where you can Formulate A Whimsical Musical melody~ -
@kiffa Jan 2022
I've been posting my limericks on Twitter
And it's making me awfully bitter
I don't ask for a lot
But with the welcome they've got?
Might as well flush them right down the s#!tter -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
You're posting on Twitter...wait, what?
I fear you perhaps lost the plot!
But then I read more
And learn the real score...
So glad your Tweet's not a Twat! -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Yes, I shared some on Twitter dot com
For my friends who aren't down with the FAWM
But while they're unimpressed
One fan thinks I'm the best
I'm a genius, according to Mom -
@stephenwordsmith Jan 2022
Sign me up for the matchmaking random
What a chance to make music in tandem
Cobble chorus and verse
From perspectives diverse
And each gain a few more for the fandom! -
@kiffa Jan 2022
Growing up, I wished I was a Mountie
Or a hunter collecting a bounty
The excitement I sought
It evolved into naught
I am a lineman for the county -
@crisp1 Jan 2022
My synapses seem to be itching
My fingers are randomly twitching
When the floodgates re-open
I hope beyond hopin’
For music both fun and bewitching -
@kenmattsson Jan 2022
As I think about other FAWMs past
I wonder if my creativities last
What have I to make
For all goodness sake
I'll wipe out all my energies fast -
@carleybaer Jan 2022
One dull afternoon I was bored
Shopping instruments I can’t afford
I wouldn’t have guessed
But now I’m obsessed
With a banjo that’s made from a gourd -
@kiffa Jan 2022
My coffers are also quite low
But can I make an instrument? No
Couldn't fashion a fife
To save my dear life
See, when it comes to woodwinds, I blow -
@berni1954 Jan 2022
These FAWMericks often are witty
And could be turned into a ditty
But some haven't grasped
The syllables asked
By a form named for an Irish City -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
Not to worry, @kiffa, you 'll do it!
It's the WOOD in the wind, where you blew it
But now, grasp the thistle!
And make a tin whistle!
By using ELECTRIC CONDUIT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzh8QHyCzDM -
@timfatchen Jan 2022
Gilbert the great played a trick
And gave Arthur Sullivan stick:
The most serious chorus
In his Ruddigore is
A straightforward limerick!
"If you wish in the world to advance,
Your merits you're bound to enhance,
You must stir it and stump it,
And blow your own trumpet,
Or, trust me, you haven't a chance!" -
@carleybaer Jan 2022
The songwriting itch needs a scratchin’
FAWM fever appears to be catchin’
Though we shouldn’t compare
I have only one prayer
Lord please make me as good as @timfatchen -
@carleybaer Jan 2022
It’s the date I can barely believe
And I hope I have tricks up my sleeve
Exciting and scary
Goodbye January
I wish you a merry FAWM eve! -
@lowhum Jan 2022
there were two ladies from twickenham
who wrote and sang songs without thinking
men just stared
utterly unprepared
though some of them developed a habit of zlinking -
@worm Jan 2022
With every appeal to the powers, My hope for humanity sours: Incompetent dopes placing all of their hopes into 672 hours.
-
@worm Jan 2022
Pooh, '28 days worth of hours' would have scanned much more nicely. I hope I have enough vodka to last until 6:00 a.m.
-
@worm Jan 2022
Is a premature lyric a cheat?
(A much stronger term than 'indiscreet')
I've heard the mods ban you very
Ticks before January,
So buddy quit kickin' your feet -
@worm Jan 2022
When it comes to these matters more lyrical, it's mistaken to treat things empirical. These kinds of things tend no beginning no end. Not so linear, rather more spherical
-
@tunecat Feb 2022
In writing and reading this here
There is wit in abundance it’s clear
And as we guffaw
And roll on the floor
Let’s hope it’ll reach me right here!! -
@timfatchen Feb 2022
It's sad, and in one sense absurd
That this gift to the written word
Should languish a week
Up the forsaken creek
With no FAWMerick writers stirred. -
@tunecat Feb 2022
So February isn’t that long
To write the most perfect song
But it’s just short enough
To dust off the fluff
And try to keep right more than wrong
Needs work but I fancied posting -
@berni1954 Feb 2022
I would love to be able to say
I reply to all listeners each day
But the truth is I don't
And till March I won't
Because February's slipping away -
@timfatchen Feb 2022
My commenting's now a bit sickly
And my conscience, increasingly prickly.
My spouse slaves away
In the garden each day
So I'm trying to listen more quickly... -
@kiffa Feb 2022
With each and every passing day
My target gets further away
With just one song finished
The odds are diminished
In the M of F, of W an A -
@jayjay Feb 2022
There once was a Songwriter (aspiring) named Jay
Who was directed to FAWM website one day
After 10 days of writing
From mostly allnighting
She has a whole album of hits (please) to display
a person can dream XD -
@berni1954 Feb 2022
After hearing a song most unpleasant
About plucking a duck or a pheasant
I took a quick break
For coffee and cake
And chilled out with Mornington Crescent -
@timfatchen Feb 2022
Ducks proved an unpleasant playing ground
So multitudes fled in a run-around.
But Mornington Crescent
Turned out most unpleasant:
All of them lost on the Underground -
@timfatchen Feb 2022
As deep in the forums it's lost
FAWMerick wears a sad cost
Like limp lettuce leaves
Consigned to deep freeze...
Let's lift it and watch it defrost! -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
Another week passes the singers,
The pitiful FAWMerick slingers.
Not even worms turning
Could set their muse burning
So FAWMerick weakly lingers. -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
FAWMerick got lost in the haze
Of all those song writing days
But I for one
Would like to keep on
And make it the very next craze -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
I thought Tim & I could revive
A thread that was barely alive
But it has not grown
We're left here alone
Wondering if it can survive -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
It's rather like wand'ring through suet
To persuade quondam writers to do it
They let this thread dive
And it's not gonna thrive
With just Berni and Tim in a duet -
@kiffa Mar 2022
When the site disappears from the 'net
Which will I more greatly regret--
Neglecting this thread,
Or my watchlist instead?
It'd not be the former, I'd bet
(In other words, I've still got a shiteload of songs to listen to) -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
Why must the choice be either or?
We're not asking you to ignore
The one or the other
My sister or brother
You can handle the two I am sure -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
It's a question of modesty.
I can handle two women, not three.
Add a dog and a wife
And a boat? I'm in strife.
Altogether, I'm all at sea. -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
The sea is the place for sailors
Whether fishermen or whalers
They're never caught short
With a girl in each port
And wives? They're mainly jailors! -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
Berni Nineteen Fifty-four,
Right now I'm stuck on the shore.
But I've emailed your lead sheet
And now feel quite downbeat...
I fear I can't do any more! -
@beacon Mar 2022
Berni and Tim keep on writing
And not many others are biting
a post FAWM lull
and many songs to cull
the comments to keep on citing -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
Correct me if I've got this wrong,
But I still see a few dozen zongs.
Though it's hard to make comment
When a zong has no content
Devoid of both lyric and song... -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
As I through FAWMerick thundered,
From sense and from sanity sundered,
I never surmised
I'd win the top prize
By churning out issue one hundred!!! -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
Tim Fatchen? He will never shirk
From getting down to some work
He sent me lead sheets
Which frankly were treats
With him as a friend it's a perk -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
I hadn't said thank you before
Cos trouble had come to my door
With results rather mixed
It's all somewhat fixed
I got what I surely asked for -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
Sad reality gratitude blunts,
For my memory makes me a dunce.
Lead sheets I MUST make
For without them, I break:
I can't sing the same song once!
(but thank you all the same!) -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
You know you don't have to repeat
Your already incredible feat
You sent lead sheets and tab
And chords simply fab
I'm ready to play on the street -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
FAWMerick hangs out a hook
But no fishies will give it a look.
If I had better bait...
But the last lot I ate,
So I'm going to FAWMku to sook. -
@lowhum Mar 2022
Streets are ready to play on
And to be painted on with crayon
So do paint on a street
Do play on it
But don't you listen to anyone's saying -
-
@timfatchen Mar 2022
Oh look! There's a few out here playing
And taking advice about "saying"!
So to buskers I meet,
I'll take care to be sweet,
And curb my instincts for slaying... -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
Two buskers I'd like to kill
Play for hours by my window sill
One bongos can't play
For four hours a day
The accordionist should make his will -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
The accordionist you'll never sway
Even if he does as you pray,
For he'll play on still
After writing his Will
'cos "where there's a Will, there's a way". -
@headfirstonly Mar 2022
"An accordionist in heaven? Obscene!"
said God, "I don't wish to be mean,
but I'll just make it clear
if he plays that in here,
he'll never be heard, only seen." -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
When you've heard "Hernando's Hideaway"
Twenty four time in one day
It's time blood to spill
An accordionist to kill
This time he will not get away! -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
Guitar shops become pits of fear
If Stairway to Heaven they hear;
So I guess it's all right,
Your accordion blight,
To cut it off when it draws near. -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
There's one song you that you never oughta
Try, if you don't want a slaughter
The rage will not stop
In a guitar shop
If you ever play "Smoke on the Water" -
@headfirstonly Mar 2022
These days, when kids play what they can, man
The music that gets them all banned, man
which throws staff in a rage
is not Blackmore, or Page
but Metallica's old "Enter Sandman" -
@lowhum Mar 2022
Now as a busker I'm not even minutely disturbed
That my head may end up smashed on the curb
Been playing all day
A tune by John Cage
On a very well-tempered suburb -
@headfirstonly Mar 2022
@lowhum you've the answer, I reckon
Fame and good fortune now beckon!
The crowds will all throng
to see you not play a song
for four minutes and thirty-three seconds... -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
In an underpass where folk traversed
Was where my old folk band rehearsed
As the coins would drop in
Wider still went our grin
Paid to rehearse, how perverse! -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
Though COVID and fires I've survived
It's been years since I last played out live
Hence my busker vendetta
Gets bigger and betta
As my own career fails to revive -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
To live on the coast is a blessing
In Winter in T-shirt's we're dressing
But this week's a pain
With nothing but rain
And grey skies that are so depressing -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
It's sunny down here without let up
And my garden wife's getting all het up.
Flood and storm up and down,
But not in this town!
I think we've been caught in a set-up. -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
For decades I was a drought quencher
When into the deserts I'd venture.
The locals would nod
"Here comes our rain-god!"
Each trip a muddy adventure.
(Some claim that a calling so holy,
Would never descend on the lowly.
But others were thrilled
As Lake Eyre I filled*
And on it, sailed my yacht slowly.)
*1974 and 1989, for the unbelievers, tho' 1989 I only filled Lake Eyre South. In one night. -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
My wife my ears threatened to belt
If I didn't confess I had help
So I'm forced to admit
My wife helped a bit
In causing those rainstorms to pelt. -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
My arid zone re-search endeavour
The rains washed away down the river.
The cattle sank deep,
The flies killed the sheep...
To still get it passed was quite clever! -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
In Oz they have true desert waste
That Tim is given to baste
He's the outback's bane
Since he brings on the rain
And gets covered in mud post-haste -
@timfatchen Mar 2022
Ah once, yes once, that was so,
But that was a long time ago.
No longer a god,
He's now an old sod
With very few strings to his bow -
@headfirstonly Mar 2022
They say 'as above, so below'
and I just thought you folks ought to know:
Tim's power has carried
We're distinctly non-arid
and tomorrow they're forecasting snow... -
@berni1954 Mar 2022
The weather here too has been crap
But I'll not blame that Tim Fatchen chap
It's politicians deranged
Who ignore climate change
Who should be taking the rap
